The best advice if anyone ever asks you to judge an awards
ceremony always used to be to thank your host for the great honour
of being asked, make a really good excuse and then run a mile just
in case they apply pressure to make you change your mind.
For there is no task more thankless and soul-destroying than
sifting through reams of platitudes in search of a crumb of truth,
or a ray of light that can illuminate...
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